Sometimes in conversation I hear people say they feel like they’re stuck. Stuck in their job, stuck in their relationships, stuck with who they live with, stuck in the same place again and again and my response is always “Perfect!” (and then they look at me like I’m bat-shit crazy, which I’m used to). I’m not saying that being stuck is the greatest feeling on earth, I’m saying that identifying the fact that you’re feeling stuck is perfect.
Why perfect? Because I know from my own experience that identifying the stuck feeling always happens right before the Big Change. It means there is a desire for options to get out of whatever it is that doesn’t fit, is causing you grief, isn’t serving you or is so far out of alignment of where you want to be going you might as well be on Mars.
When I’m stuck I can’t see the options…but I want them. It’s feeling like if I knew what the choices were I would have made one by now but I’m so lost in the stuckness I can’t see anything. This is when I call on someone who will just listen. Someone who won’t offer advice, won’t give their opinion, won’t judge, won’t explain what we’re doing wrong, they just listen.
It’s in this space that the choices we need to make to get unstuck are found. The choices (whether we like them or not) are all inside us but we will never see them unless we start getting all the shit out of our heads and out in the open. That’s when the options become plentiful (which I find to be a total pain in the ass sometimes) but more importantly, the choice you need to make becomes clear.
Stuck is just the place you’re in right before you get unstuck.